Sunday, May 3, 2015

Berlin Vol.1

About two weeks ago now I spent an amazing weekend in Berlin doing some work that I'm very excited about! The whole experience was really important for me because Going to Berlin was the first trip I had been on since I came back from London, and it just made me realise even more so then ever that even though I love Munich to the death, I need to keep going on and see more of whats out there. I guess for me Munich has become a safety net location because it's the one and only place I really have a connection to the community in. Growing up around the world and never spending a really significant amount of time in one place, mixed with the atmosphere of the international school (your friends never stay in the same place either) has left me with a sort of FOMO social anxiety thats constant and on going. When I moved to London (the first time without my personal support group consisting of my four sisters and my parents) I didn't even realise how bad I let my anxiety take over me. At first it was a bit of home sickness, even though the people I needed to see weren't even all back at home. (Long distance family & long distance relationship #ftw) This soon turned into me deciding not to venture about London in the fear of comparing it to Munich constantly and not enjoying myself. So I sat at home a lot watching netflix, working off of my computer and not enjoying myself. The anxiety that I left something better really crippled my ability to try and find something new. So when it came time to move back I had high hopes of my anxiety drifting away and leaving me be. I had no such luck. Coming back home made it worse, I was scared to leave again, this time around I got most of my life back to the comfort I had always had it in, but I have the constant fear that if I leave it won't come back to me a third time.
So I guess starting small and venturing into Berlin for a weekend doesn't seem like much, but it got me to realise how much I enjoyed being away from Munich, being able to breath and not having to think about restoring my life to what it was a few years ago. Three cheers to getting anxiety free :)
Happy Sunday!




5 comments:

  1. Love your photos! I'd love to visit Berlin one day!
    ~Sophia
    http://plaidismyfavouritecolour.blogspot.com/

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  2. Have you given up on your blog?? You never post anymore!

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